Phantom Pet Phenomenon
All right..We’ve all been in this situation right? The situation where you are going either up or down a pair of steps and all of a sudden you feel something beneath your foot as you step and you end up stumbling. Maybe even falling. Upon your quick accessuation of the area you see there is nothing around at all.
This, my friends, I have deemed to call “Phantom Pet Phanomena”. Or “PPP,” since we as a society are inclined to shorten everything. It can happen to us at any time of day. Early in the morning, lunch time, a night of drinking..It doesn’t matter. There always comes a point where we go to make a step and mysteriously feel that there is something there that is waiting to kill us when we step down. Our brain doesn’t realize it, because it’s all about continuing about our forward momentum. But our bodies..Oh our bodies know. They know instinctively that if we put that foot down it is going to get bitten off..Or melt into lava..Who knows? It’s hard to ask the body since the brain stays separated from it in terms of logic. In the past year I suffered from one “PPP” incident where I was going down the steps and just as my foot was about to hit the next step my leg said “Screw you! I like being whole. Let the rest of the body take the hit. As long as I end up living as a whole being.” Yes, in my world, the body is separated into segments that think for themselves. Makes sense really. When you go towards something hot yer hand is all about self preservation. It’s screaming at you to not touch that metal pan with a metal handle that has been sitting on a burner for an hour. Your brain just decided to override your hand’s instinct. That’s how it’s supposed to work. But the “PPP” plague that occurs..that is something else entirely. It’s something that your body overrides your brain on completely. Doesn’t even matter if you are actually looking where you are going. If your limb feels the presence of these Phantom Pets, you will go down, or at least stumble. The craziest aspect of this is that it doesn’t even just happen in your own home. You don’t even actually to own any pets for you to become a victim of this phenomena. How many times have you walked down a flat street or through a mall hallway and randomly trip? First thing that pops in your head is that you tripped over your own feet right? What if, what really happened, was your body sensed a phantom ferret right in front of its feet so the legs stuttered to avoid crushing this phantom animal. It’s my belief that the majority of the accidents that happen in bathrooms while showering, etc. are cause by phantom pet phenomena. Our bodies are sensing phantom animals or bugs…Yes, bugs fall under this as well. Because we all instictively recoil when we see a bug while we’re showering because we are vulnerable at that time. Perhaps these phantom creatures have been staging a war against us for years..we’ve just never realised it. Of course..if that is the truth of the matter..then I may end up being “hidden away” by these said creatures.
Here’s hoping the phantom pets do not decide to “squirrel” me away. And yes, I had to use a pun there. Also, this post was brought to you exclusively by my wife. As I wrote it up last night but wasn’t sure if it was something I should go ahead and post. So please..any irritation you may have with it..Send her way as I am bound to do whatever she tells me. Seeing as we are married.